Tuesday, October 10, 2006

I Don't Do Sports (Normally)

Normally, I don't "do" sports.

I have no time.

Normally, I have no interest.

I do, however, watch the SuperBowl. Well, that's not true. I TiVo the SuperBowl - that way I can fast forward through all the absolute crap that the armchair quaterbacks (the announcers) have to say - and I can skip all the completely useless stats that they feel compelled to share every 20 seconds or so.

Plus, I have twin 5-1/2 year olds - who will never sit through one episode of Spongebob - forget about a 4-1/2 hour game of grown men trying to beat the hell out of each other.

I could really care less about who was playing (I didn't even KNOW who was playing until it started), or where they were playing (Detroit - but only because Mick Jagger said so at halftime).

I was there for the halftime show.

I figured there would be little chance of seeing any more breasts flying around - but there was something equally as funny: Keith Richards still alive.

I mean, really! The Rolling Stones could all qualify for Social Security - and here they are prancing around "singing." Mick - I saw you in Vegas and you were great - next time they ask you to do a halftime show - try to actually hit ANY note and try to remember the words to your own damn song!

Oh, and lose Keith Richards. At least he didn't sing (as he did in Vegas) - but don't let him walk around and try to "play guitar" at the same time. Not gonna' work. Not enough brain cells left. He can't chew gum and walk either. Trust me.

Was it as good as a "costume malfunction?" Nope. Was it worth injuring my "fast forward" finger to get to the halftime show. Sort of. Would have been much better to see Keith in his natural habitat with a cigarette dangling from his mouth, drunk, weaving dangerously close to the edge of that massive stage...

But hey, what do you want for a free show?

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